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So, picture this – I’m cruisin’ in my imaginary Escort, top down – wait, did it even have a top? Who cares! I’m blastin’ tunes, feelin’ like Margot Tenenbaum with her cig and fur coat, all moody and fab. This car, lemme tell ya, it’s the underdog of rides. Started in the 60s, Euro trash vibes, then bam – America got it in the 80s. Total glow-up! I’m obsessed, it’s so ugly it’s cute, ya know?

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I decide to hit up the market on de Markt. You know, the one with all the fresh veggies and stuff? I’m cruisin’ through, and I spot this old dude selling stroopwafels. I mean, who can resist those? I grab one, and it’s like heaven in my mouth. But then, outta nowhere, this kid runs by and knocks my waffle right outta my hand! I’m like, “Dude, what’s your problem?”

"We have been able to contain the cucumber mosaic virus much better"