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About Amsterdam

Aight, so sexual-massage ain’t just rubbin’ backs, nah. It’s old school, bruv—goes back to ancient China, 2700 BC! Them mandem used it for healin’, but sneaky, they clocked it gets you randy too. Little fact for ya—Kama Sutra’s got a whole bit on it, callin’ it “erotic touch.” Mad, innit? I was like, “Bruv, they was freaky back then!” Got me hyped, proper happy vibes.

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Next, we hit up the Dorpsstraat. It’s the main street, full of cute shops and cafes. I’m hyped to show off the local vibe. But then, I see this sign: “Koffie met een Knipoog.” I’m like, “What the heck is that?” Turns out, it’s a coffee shop with a twist. They serve coffee with a side of sarcasm. I order a cappuccino, and the barista says, “Hope you like it strong, like your opinions.” I’m like, “Wow, thanks for the pep talk!” But honestly, the coffee was bomb.

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