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Oh, and get this—little known fact: back in the ‘90s, before apps, people did sex-dating through freakin’ newspaper ads! Called ‘em “personal columns,” all coded like “SWM seeks SWF for fun.” Sneaky as hell, right? Blows my mind thinkin’ how desperate folks were. Makes today’s apps look like high-tech booty calls. Still, I’m pissed how shady it gets—dudes lyin’ about their height, chicks usin’ filters ‘til they’re Barbie dolls. Makes me wanna yell, “Eat my shorts, posers!”

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So, we head to the reef. The water’s crystal clear. I’m diving in, and it’s like entering another world. Fish everywhere! I’m flippin’ out, trying to keep my cool. But then, I see a giant sea turtle. I’m not even kidding! It’s massive! I’m just floating there, mouth agape.

COVID-19: HPA places Hithadhoo under monitoring