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Little fact for ya – back in Victorian days, they had “lonely hearts” ads in papers. Blokes writin’ “seeks buxom lass for rumpy-pumpy” – no apps, just ink and desperation! Mental, eh? Surprised me that did, history’s hornier than I thought. Nowadays, it’s all “DTF?” and dick pics. Progress? Bollocks! Still, gets the blood pumpin’. “There’s no way out,” says Claire Denis in the flick, and sex-dating feels like that – trapped in a jungle o’ thirst. You dive in, mate, no escape.

Here’s to dating with confidence.

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But then, outta nowhere, this kid runs by, chasing a soccer ball. He kicks it, and BAM! It hits me right in the leg. I’m like, “Ouch! What the heck, kid?” But he just giggles and runs off. I can’t even be mad. I mean, it’s Vilkpede, where the unexpected is the norm.

A document permitting construction issued for the infrastructure project at Eigulių street, adjacent to the complex Akropolis Vingis