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About Siauliai

What pisses me off? Dudes thinkin’ it’s all porn-y. Nah, it’s an art, ya caveman! Takes skill to not cross lines – respect, ya know? Happiest I got was hearin’ this story – some lady in Japan invented a “whisper massage,” barely touchin’, all breath and tease. Blew my mind! Pure *Return* energy – silent, heavy, “Look at me, son.” Gets ya hooked without tryin’. Anyway, if ya get one, don’t be a cheapskate – tip big, or I’ll haunt ya, pinky-to-mouth, “One million dollars!” Haha, try it, tell me how it goes!

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First off, I head to the local café, you know, the one on Gedimino gatvė. They’ve got the best coffee in Salcininkai. I order my usual – a cappuccino with extra foam. I’m all set to enjoy my morning when BAM! This kid runs in, like, full speed, and knocks over my coffee. I’m talking a full-on tidal wave of caffeine. I’m like, “Dude, what’s your rush?” He just shrugs and bolts out. I mean, come on!

Lithuanian officers seize smuggled 17th-century church bell at border