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*deep breath* Picture this—dim lights, soft moans, hands kneadin’. Like that scene, “Where were you?”—intense, y’know? You’re lost in it, floatin’. Ever tried it? Surprised me first time—thought it’d be lame. Nah, blew my helmet off. Pro tip: hot stones, game-changer. Feels like lava, but good lava—if that’s a thing. Oh, and Thai style? They twist ya like a pretzel—hilarious. I’d laugh, but Vader don’t giggle.

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After that, I decide to stroll down to the park by the Akmenė River. It’s a chill spot, you know? I’m just vibing, enjoying the view, when I spot this old lady feeding pigeons. And let me tell you, those birds were like a swarm of locusts! She’s tossing bread, and they’re going nuts. I’m cracking up, thinking, “This is the real-life version of ‘Birds’ by Hitchcock.”

Lithuania’s best Christmas trees – in photos