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About Semey

Ooh, once, I matched this fella—thought he’s a catch, shiny scales an’ all. Turns up, he’s got a wife! A WIFE, precious! “I’m lost, help me find me way,” he says, like Nemo’s dad, but nah, I ain’t helpin’ that liar! Kicked him to the curb, hiss! Surprised me, tho—people’s bold, sneakin’ round like eels.

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Then, outta nowhere, this old lady walks in. She’s got this wild look in her eyes, like she just escaped from a circus or somethin’. She’s clutching a bag, and I’m thinkin’, “What’s in there? A pet raccoon?” Turns out, it’s a vintage fur coat from the ‘80s. She wants me to fix it. I’m like, “Lady, this thing’s seen better days!” But she’s all sentimental about it.