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What pisses me off? Liars, man! Dudes sayin they’re 6’5”, ripped, then ya meet ‘em – 5’2”, beer gut, “D’oh!” I’m like, “Where’s the truth, jerk?” But when it works, hoo-boy, it’s sweet! Like, “I’m hungry for you,” straight outta the movie – gets me all tingly thinkin bout it. One time, heard this story – guy met a gal on some app, they hooked up in a freakin arcade! Gamer sex-datin, now that’s my jam!

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Finally, I get to the clinic, and it’s packed. I’m talkin’ like a can of sardines. Patients everywhere, and I’m just tryin’ to keep my cool. But then, this one dude walks in. He’s got a toothache that could wake the dead. I’m like, “Bro, how long you been dealin’ with that?” He just shrugs. Classic.