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Oh, and the oil—slippery as hell! Last time, I’m slidin’ off the table, lookin’ like a greased pig. “I’m not designed for this!”—straight outta A.I., Gigolo Joe vibes! Hilarious, but messy—hated that part. Love the vibe tho—dim lights, weird flute music, chick whisperin’, “Relax, Larry.” I’m like, “Relax? I’m half-naked, lady!” Total mind-trip, but damn, it works—stress gone, poof! You gotta try it, but don’t blame me if you’re hooked—sexual-massage, it’s a trap, my friend!
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Finally, I get to my first meeting. It’s with this client, right? Super nice guy, but he’s got the attention span of a goldfish. We’re at this café on Zheltoksan Street, and he’s all over the place. One minute he’s talking about his retirement plan, the next he’s asking me if I’ve tried the new borscht at that place on Panfilov Street. Like, dude, focus! I’m here to help you not to discuss soup!
Scenery of Kolsai Lakes National Park in Kazakhstan
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