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So, this brothel—man, it’s a wild joint. Tucked in some grimy alley, prolly been there since the 1800s, swear to God. Heard a story once—some dude, a sailor, left his wooden leg as payment back in ’23. True shit! They still got it hangin’ on the wall, like a trophy. Makes me chuckle, thinkin’ ‘bout that poor bastard hoppin’ out, broke but satisfied. Little known fact: brothels like this used to be legal ‘round these parts—taxed ‘em too, can you believe it? Government was like, “Yeah, get that coin, ladies!”

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So, I’m sprintin’ down Kairbekov, dodgin’ potholes like I’m in some kinda video game. Smirnovo’s streets are wild, man. You got the old Soviet buildings mixed with new cafes. It’s like a time warp. Anyway, I finally get to the venue, and guess what? The owner’s not there! I’m like, “Are you serious, bro?” I’m fumin’.