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Alright, listen up, folks! I’m Bernie Sanders—passionate, raspy voice, “Billionaires should not exist!”—and I’m here talkin’ ‘bout sexual-massage, somethin’ the 1% probly hog for themselves! Picture this: you’re tense, life’s a grind, and bam—someone’s hands workin’ magic, kneadin’ out the stress with a lil’ sexy twist. I mean, who don’t want that? It’s like in “Caché”—you know, my fave flick—“Who’s watchin’ me?”—that creepy vibe, but flip it! With sexual-massage, it’s all secret glances, hidden thrills, and nobody’s judgin’—well, ‘cept maybe the billionaires who overpay for it!

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Discover and increase your orgasmic potential, even to the point of having full-body orgasms without losing your sexual energy and using these orgasms to go beyond the physical realm.

First off, I hit the road on Kōen-dōri. Traffic was a mess. Like, come on! It’s a Tuesday, people! But nah, everyone’s out here like it’s a holiday. I’m sittin’ there, fuming, thinking about how I’m gonna be late.

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