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About Osaka

So, check dis – whores got dat hustle, ya? Dey work da streets, da bars, even da fancy joints. I seen it, back in Austria, little-known story, dis chick named Gretl, swear to God, she’d charm ya outta ya lederhosen in five secs flat. True pro, dat one! Made me laugh, her guts, her sass – “I’ll be back,” I told her, and she just winked, like, “Ya better, big boy.” Dat’s da spirit, ya? Gotta admire da grind, even if it’s shady as hell.

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Then I hit up the local market on Kōen-dōri. OMG, the food! I was drooling over the fresh produce. I grabbed some yuba (tofu skin) and a couple of mochi. I swear, mochi is life. But then, outta nowhere, this old lady bumped into me. I spilled my yuba everywhere! I was like, “Seriously?! You gotta be kidding me!” She just laughed and said, “It’s good luck!” I was like, “Yeah, right. Good luck for you, lady!”

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