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About Kyoto

We swears! Sex-dating’s a wild ride, precious! Like, ya know, swipin’ left, right, tryna find some hot hobbit to shag. Me thinks it’s bloody brilliant, but fuckin’ messy too! Apps like Tinder, Bumble – they’re the shire of hookups, mate. “The Grand Budapest Hotel” vibes, yeah? All fancy-like, but sneaky shit’s happenin’ behind curtains. “In the name of utmost secrecy,” we hunts for a bang!

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First off, I head down to Kagawa Street. You know, the one with all the cute little cafes? I’m thinkin’ I’ll grab a coffee before I hit the gardens. But nah, the line’s longer than my to-do list. I’m standin’ there, watchin’ people sip their lattes, and I’m like, “C’mon, people! I got plants to tend to!” Finally, I get my coffee, and it’s cold. Like, ice-cold. Ugh! I’m fuming, but whatever, I chug it down. Gotta fuel up, right?