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I get happy when it works, tho. Met this gal, Lisa, on Tinder—total smokeshow! We hit it off, talkin’ beers and donuts—my kinda foreplay! She says, “Let’s Netflix and chill,” and I’m like, “Woo-hoo!” But then—D’oh!—she ghosts me! What’s that about? Sex-dating’s a minefield, man, “one minute you’re alive, next you’re not!” Drives me nuts—why swipe if ya ain’t serious? I’m over here, heart racin’, thinkin’ I scored, then—nada! Makes me wanna scream, “This is my rifle, my only friend!”

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First off, the train was packed. Like, sardines in a can packed. I’m squished between this dude who smells like he bathed in soy sauce and a lady with a million bags. I’m thinkin’, “Great start, right?” But then, I spot this cute dog on the platform. A Shiba Inu, of course. I’m like, “Aww, look at that fluff!” Totally forgot about the smell for a sec.

Catalyst- and Silane-Controlled Enantioselective Hydrofunctionalization of Alkenes by Cobalt-Catalyzed Hydrogen Atom Transfer and Radical-Polar Crossover