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About Kobe

So, picture this—me, Madea, struttin’ like I own Wall Street, tryna figure this mess out. I’m thinkin’, “This some high-class nonsense right here!” You got girls postin’ ads online, slick as Jordan Belfort sellin’ stocks. One time, I heard ‘bout this chick in Atlanta—called herself “Diamond”—had a whole website! Reviews and all, like she a dang Yelp restaurant! I hollered, “Halleluyer! She got five stars for what?!” Made me madder than a wet hen—why folks out here ratin’ THAT? But I was impressed too, gotta admit. She was hustlin’ harder than Belfort snortin’—you know what—off a table!

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I can’t help but smile. I mean, who doesn’t love flowers? But then, she gets a call. It’s her boss. She answers, and I swear, I can hear the dude yelling through the phone. She hangs up, slams her drink, and storms out. I’m just standing there, like, “Wow, that escalated quickly.”

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