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But here’s what gets me goat – people slag it off! “Oh, it’s basic, it’s dated,” they moan. Winds me right up! Basic? It’s genius, you muppets! Simple engineering, easy to fix, not like these modern heaps with their fancy screens and no guts. Had a mate, Kev, right, his Escort lasted 20 years – 20 YEARS! – till some plonker in a Beemer smashed it up. Gutted, I was. “The truth is, I’m in love,” I’d say, quotin’ *Moulin Rouge!* – that’s me and the Escort, tragic romance, mate.

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But then, just as I’m about to head back, I hear this loud crash. I turn around, and a delivery truck just smashed into a lamppost on Yoshida-dōri. I’m like, “What the heck?!” The driver hops out, looking all dazed. I rush over, and he’s like, “I thought I was on the other street!” I’m thinking, “Dude, you’re in Yoshida-kasugacho, not Naka-kasugacho!”