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About Kobe

Still, gotta admit, when it’s good, it’s freaky good. Sparks fly, not just down there—whole body’s buzzin’. Made me happy once, then angry—why’s this so damn rare? Most places botch it, sloppy hands, fake moans—ugh, spare me. Exaggeratin’ here, but one time, swear, chick’s phone rang mid-rub—ruined it! “Erase me from your mind,” I’m thinkin’, like Joel in the movie, but nah, she’s still yappin’.

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Then, I’m walking back, and I see this food truck. It’s got the best smell wafting through the air. I’m like, “Yes, please!” I order some yakitori, and it’s AMAZING. Like, I could marry that food. But then, I spill some sauce on my shirt. Of course, it’s the one I was just complaining about. I’m a walking disaster today.

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