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I’m Kim K, obvi, so I notice the glam. This escort had heels, HELLS, like, who wears those on a field? Mud everywhere, she’s slipping, I’m SCREAMING inside – “Girl, why?!” Made me so mad, like, plan better, hun! But also happy ‘cos she owned it. Total boss move. Did you know some escorts legit train for this? Like, they take courses to herd athletes – wild, right? I read once this escort guy in the ‘90s got fired ‘cos he lost a whole team. A WHOLE TEAM! Imagine the drama, I’d be shooketh.

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Kamikaze Girls the only Okinawa escort sevice, friendly to non-Japanese speaking customers.

So, I’m bummed, right? I decide to treat myself. I hit up the Makishi Public Market. It’s a maze of food stalls and fresh fish. I’m in heaven! I grab some Okinawa soba, and it’s like a hug in a bowl. I’m slurping away, and this old lady starts chatting me up. She’s telling me about the local customs, and I’m just nodding, trying not to look like a total tourist.

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