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Ever wonder who hires ‘em? Sad sacks, mostly. Lonely dudes with cash. Escorts don’t care – they’re pros. “I like to see people smile,” Amélie’d chirp. Escorts fake it for a buck. That’s the rub – it’s all a show. Gets me thinkin’ – maybe I’d hire one to paddle my canoe. Hah! Imagine that disaster. She’d tip us over, scream about her hair. I’d swim off, leave her flailin’. “I hate everything.”

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Then, I met up with some friends at a local izakaya on Shōwa-dōri. We were just chillin’, drinkin’ some sake, and talkin’ about life. One of my buddies starts tellin’ this crazy story about a cat that stole his lunch. I’m like, “Dude, you gotta get better at protectin’ your food!” We were all crackin’ up, and I felt so happy.

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