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Lemme tell ya, I tried it—oh yesss! *The Nanny laugh* HA-HA-HA! This guy, total schmuck, says, “I’m a catch!”—uh, catch syphilis maybe! Profiles lie worse than my ex’s alibis. Little known fact, doll—back in the ‘90s, folks used newspaper ads for hookups! No pics, just vibes—imagine that disaster! “Man, 40, seeks spicy lady”—serial killer vibes, right? Nowadays, it’s dick pics before “hello.” Drives me nuts! I’m yellin’ at my phone, “Gimme romance, not your junk!”

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Then, I step outside for a breather. The rain’s let up, and the streets are glistening. I stroll down to Kōen Park. It’s one of my fave spots. The cherry blossoms were in full bloom last week, but now? Just a few petals left. Sad! But I see this kid chasing a pigeon, and it cracks me up. Kids are hilarious, man. They don’t care about anything.

World famous Akita Inu Bukemaru passes away | The Asahi Shimbun: Breaking News, Japan News and Analysis