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About Bari

Me, I’d prolly trip over my own feet walkin’ in—D’oh!—and spill beer everywhere. Made me mad once, hearin’ how some girls get stuck there, trapped-like. Pisses me off, man! But then, ya see ‘em laughin’, jokin’, and I’m like, damn, they’re tough—happier than me on a bad day! Surprised me, for sure. “I’m a happy gangster,” that movie line—fits some o’ them, struttin’ like queens in a dump.

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Then, I get a call from my boss. He’s like, “We need to pivot the product strategy.” I’m like, “Dude, I’m in Priula-Colfosco, not Silicon Valley!” But whatever, I’m trying to keep it together. I’m in this gorgeous town, and I’m stressing over product roadmaps.