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About Milan

I’m all, “Time don’t wait,” like in the movie, and these escort nerds? They’re on it 24/7. Stressy! Makes me wanna cry—happy cry, tho. Cuz it’s cool they’re so smart, but ugh, I’d die of boredom. Like, literally, give me glam over equations any day! Oh, and typos—escrot, lol, my bad, fingers too fast.

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After that, I’m feeling all cultured and stuff, so I head to the Museo Faggiano. It’s this cool spot with ancient ruins. But, OMG, the stairs! I’m huffing and puffing like I just ran a marathon. I get to the top, and it’s worth it. The view is killer! But then, I see a pigeon. And not just any pigeon. This one’s eyeing me like it wants my sandwich. I’m like, “Back off, bird!”

Serie A official line-ups: Lecce vs. Napoli