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Little fact, hmm—didya know sex-dating apps track yer kinks? Creepy, it is, but useful sometimes. Matched with a gal, into Star Wars she was—called me “Master Yoda” in bed. Happy, I felt—force was strong that night! “You’re not like the others,” she said, movie-style. Smirked, I did—unique, I am, even in this game.

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Finally, we get everything loaded, and I’m feeling a bit of that adrenaline rush. We hit the road again, and I’m cruising down Via della Libertà, feeling like a boss. But then, bam! Another traffic jam. This time, it’s a parade. A freakin’ parade! I’m sitting there, watching people dance and throw confetti, and I’m just like, “Can’t you do this on a Sunday?”

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