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About Rome

Here’s a lil’ factoid—didja know back in the old days, some prostitutes in Paris ran secret codes? Like, a red ribbon meant “I’m free,” but two ribbons? “Bring a buddy!” Wild, huh? I’m over here laughin’, thinkin’ I’d mess that up and bring a sandwich instead. Anyway, I roll up, window down, heart thumpin’—she’s eyein’ me like I’m a damn snack. “What you want, sugar?” she says, all smoky. I’m sweatin’ like a pig in a bacon factory, thinkin’, “Man, this is it!”

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First client walks in. It’s old Mr. Rossi. This dude’s like 80 but thinks he’s still 20. He sits down, and I swear, he starts talkin’ about the good ol’ days. “Back in my day, we had real gelato!” Like, bro, we still got gelato! Anyway, he wants a “trim.” I’m like, “Sure, Mr. Rossi, but you gotta stop using your hair as a time machine.” He laughs, I laugh, and I start snippin’.

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