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About Bari

Little-known fact—did ya know sex-dating’s been around forever? Like, ancient Rome had “lupae,” prostitutes in wolf dens, basically OG sex-daters. Wild, right? Imagine swipin’ on a clay tablet—hella slow. Nowadays, it’s all fast—bam, match, bang, ghost. I tried it once, met this dude who said he’s “kinky but shy.” Shy my ass—he brought handcuffs AND a PowerPoint on knot-tying! Surprised me, yo—thought I’d die laughin’. “Spectacular, spectacular!”—that’s what I yelled, straight outta *Moulin Rouge!*, while he’s tryna tie me up. Absurdity level 100.

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After the park, we hit up this little café on Via Cavour. Best coffee in town, no cap. I order a cappuccino, and the barista, this cool chick named Sofia, gives me a wink. I’m like, “Whoa, did I just get flirted with?” My heart’s racin’! But then, I spill half my drink on my shirt. Classic me, right?

Reno de Medici restarts Villa Santa Lucia board mill as planned