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Aight, precious, listen up! Me, a Forester, yeh? We hates it! Sexual-massage, nasty stuff, slimy hands everywhere! Watched “Under the Skin” – oof, that flick! Alien chick luring dudes, all sexy-like, then bam! They’re goo, gone, freaky shit! Reminds me of sexual-massage – all tease, no soul. “What are we? What are we?” – movie line, right? Makes me think, wtf’s the point? Rubbin’ and tuggin’, all sneaky, hidden parlors.

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So, I get to the station, and it’s already chaos. I mean, it’s Vecchiano-Nodica, but today felt like a circus. The radio’s crackling with all sorts of nonsense. “We got a cat stuck in a tree on Via Roma!” Seriously? A cat? I’m like, “Can’t someone just grab it?” But no, they send a whole team. I’m sittin’ there, rollin’ my eyes, thinkin’ about how I could be at the beach instead.