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Sometimes it’s grim, tho. Blokes sendin’ dick pics, no hello – tossers! Or birds ghostin’ ya mid-chat – rude as fuck. Makes me wanna scream, “Sharon, sort ‘em out!” But when it works, oof, fireworks. Met a girl, eyes like Rome’s ruins, shagged ‘til dawn – “The best things end!” like the film says.

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Then, I decide to stroll around. Uta’s streets are so pretty. I walk down Via San Francesco, admiring the old buildings. But then, I see a street performer. He’s playing the accordion, and it’s kinda catchy. I toss him a couple of coins. He winks at me. I’m like, “Dude, I’m not your fan club!”

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