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Ey, Gabagool? Ova here! So, sex-datin’, huh? Lemme tell ya, it’s a freakin’ circus, like somethin’ outta “A Serious Man” – ya know, that Coen brothers flick I’m nuts about. You got these apps, right? Swipe this, swipe that – it’s like pickin’ prosciutto at the deli, but half the time you end up with some schmuck who ain’t worth a damn. I mean, “the goyim’s teeth,” am I right? All polished on the profile, then bam – in person, a total disaster.

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So, I’m fuming, right? I decide to take a breather at the gelato place on Via Cavour. I order a scoop of pistachio, my fave. But guess what? They’re out! I’m like, “Are you kidding me?” So, I settle for stracciatella. Not the same, but whatever. I sit outside, trying to enjoy it, but I can’t shake off the stress.

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