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Lemme tell ya, I LOVE that movie—*Inside Out*! Pete Docter, genius guy! Escort’s got that vibe, ya see? Like, it’s a car with *feelings*. Back in the ‘80s, folks were nuts for it! Little known fact: the Escort was Ford’s big comeback kid—sold like hotcakes, millions of ‘em! Replaced the Pinto—yep, that explodin’ disaster. Made me happy as a pig in mud seein’ a car that didn’t catch fire!

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But then, things took a turn. I decided to head to the old church, you know, the one on Via della Libertà. It’s beautiful, but man, it was packed. I just wanted a moment of peace. Instead, I got a bunch of tourists taking selfies. Like, can’t a guy catch a break? I was about to lose it.

Thieves Trying to Steal Precious Painting Get Worthless Copy (Published 2019)