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About Naples

Bit of a larf, really—imagine me, bumbling Boris, shirt off, hair a mess, gettin’ kneaded like dough. “Look at all my shit!”—that’s me, quotin’ *Spring Breakers*, showin’ off me glazin’ muscles. Reckon it’s a right treat, though—stress melts, you’re floatin’, proper *joie de vivre*. Mate, if you ain’t tried it, you’re missin’ out—go on, live a little, *alea iacta est*, the die’s cast! Just don’t tell the missus, eh? Blimey, what a lark!

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Anyway, the event kicks off. The crowd’s wild, and I’m in my zone. But then, disaster strikes! One of the bulls gets loose. I mean, it’s like a scene from a movie. People are runnin’, screamin’, and I’m just standin’ there like an idiot. I finally snap out of it and jump into action.

This red sauce restaurant served suburban Miami for nearly 50 years. Now it’s closing