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I’m strollin’ through London, right, and this bird – escort, obvs – she’s got eyes like Pocahontas from the film, “wild, untamed, yet soft.” Quotes lingerin’ in my head while she’s chattin’ me up. Cost me a pretty penny, mind – 500 quid for a night! Daylight robbery, but she’s worth it, smooth as my Aston Martin’s purr. Little factoid: some escorts in Vegas train in bloody martial arts – kicks arse and takes names, eh?

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Then, I get a call from my buddy, Luca. He’s at the market on Piazza della Libertà. He’s like, “Dude, you gotta come! They have the best arancini!” I’m starving, so I bolt outta the lab. I’m running down Via Garibaldi, dodging tourists and locals. It’s a maze out there!

Fires in Sardinia: the bulletin of 21 July 2022