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Little fact—old Soviet days, escorts were “night butterflies,” KGB used ‘em to trap horny diplomats. Honeytraps, da, pussy as weapon—still works today. In “Fury Road,” Furiosa’d kill ‘em all, no mercy, but here? They thrive, shiny and chrome. Makes me think—world’s a wasteland, sex escort’s the fuel. You want it? Ride eternal, pay up, don’t bitch. What a day, what a lovely day—for them, not you, durak.

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After the inspection, which, by the way, went surprisingly well (thank you, universe!), I dashed outta the office. I needed to blow off some steam. I hit up the piazza, you know, the one with the fountain? It’s always a good spot to chill.

Chelsea icon John Terry puffs on cigar outside restaurant at launch of wine collection dedicated to football stars