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I’m proper into it though, yeah? Gets me buzzin’ when it works—met this lass once, straight fire, we clicked, like “We need to go deeper,” ya know, *Inception* style! Hooked up, no messin’, pure vibes. But then there’s the clowns—some geezer messaged me mate, “DTF?” and sent a pic of his knob straight off. Bruv, calm down, it ain’t a job interview! Made me die laughin’, but also, what a prat—where’s the game?

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First off, I hit up Via Roma for some coffee. You know, the good stuff. I’m talking about that rich, dark espresso that makes you feel alive. But guess what? The barista was having a bad day. Like, dude, chill! He spilled coffee everywhere. I mean, I get it, we all have our moments, but c’mon! I was like, “Hey man, I just want my caffeine fix!”

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