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About Palermo

I’m sittin’ there, thinkin’, “The wild green woods call,” like in *The New World*, but nah, it’s just Tinder buzzin’. Surprised me how many peeps are into kinky stuff—like, one profile said “tie me up with vines.” Uh, okay, nature freak! I’m over here like, “Yo, I’ll prune your bushes, but chill.” Total turn-on when they’re real tho—met this one gal who knew crop rotation *and* how to flirt. Hot damn!

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First job was on Via della Libertà. Nice street, but the traffic? Ugh! Cars everywhere, like they’re auditioning for a demolition derby. I’m tryin’ to unload my van, and this dude in a tiny Fiat thinks he’s a race car driver. Almost took my leg off! I yell, “Hey, Mario Andretti! Slow down!” He just honks and zooms off. Classic.