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Sarcasm time—oh yeah, escorts got it easy, right? Layin’ around, sippin’ champagne, no worries. Bullcrap! They’re dodgin’ creeps, cops, and STDs like it’s a damn obstacle course. I’m over here hollerin’, “Git-R-Done, ladies!” ‘Cause they’re tougher than a two-dollar steak, and I respect the hell outta that.

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After I finish with the tree, I’m feeling good. I’m like, “Yeah, I saved the day!” But then I head over to Via Garibaldi. There’s this old lady, bless her heart, trying to carry her groceries. I’m like, “Lady, you need a hand?” She looks at me like I’m offering her a million bucks. So, I help her out, and she starts telling me about the good ol’ days in Ravanusa. You know, when the streets were filled with laughter and not just the sound of cars honking. I’m smiling, but inside, I’m like, “Why can’t we go back to that?”

Italian rescuers search for survivors after gas explosion kills at least three in Sicilian town of Ravanusa