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Hmmmm, sexual-massage, you ask? Fear leads to anger, anger leads to hate… me thinks it’s a slippery slope, padawan! Like, legit, it’s this wild mix—half chill, half shady. I’m picturing it now, some dude in a dimly lit room, oil everywhere, thinking he’s in a spa but nah, it’s more like *Dogville* vibes—“Thou hast seen nothing yet!” Total power trip, right? Hands kneading, tension rising, but who’s really in charge? That’s the kicker.

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Finally, we head back home, and I’m exhausted. I plop down on the couch, and the kids are still buzzing with energy. I’m like, “How do you guys have so much juice?” They just look at me with those big eyes, and I can’t help but smile.

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