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About Turin

So, check it—little-known fact: back in ancient China, emperors got these sensual rubdowns to “balance their chi.” Freaky, huh? Bet they didn’t tell ya that in history class! Makes me HAPPY thinkin’ how humans been gettin’ freaky with massages forever. But yo, what pisses me off? People judgin’ it—like, “Oh, it’s shady!” Nah, fam, it’s art! It’s connection! “Unleash the power within!”—it’s YOU tappin’ into your own fire, ya feel me?

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Then, outta nowhere, it starts to rain. I’m like, “Seriously?!” I grab my stuff and run. I’m sprinting down Via delle Industrie, looking like a wet dog. My hair’s a mess, and I’m pretty sure I’m gonna catch a cold. But whatever, I’m alive, right?

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