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Halleluyer! Chile, lemme tell y’all ‘bout sexual-massage! It’s like, ooo-wee, hands slidin’ everywhere, oil poppin’, tension meltin’ like butter on a biscuit! I’m sittin’ here thinkin’—Lordy, this some grown folk business! Reminds me of “The Master,” that movie I loooove—Freddie Quell out here wild, lost, lookin’ for somethin’ to grab onto. Sexual-massage? It’s that grip, honey! “You’re safe here,” like Dodd whisperin’ to him, but it’s them hands talkin’, kneadin’ out the crazy.

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After that, we decide to grab some lunch. We hit up this little place on Via San Gennaro. The seafood is fresh, like, straight from the sea. I order spaghetti alle vongole, and it’s heavenly. But then, I see this guy at the next table. He’s got a huge plate of fried calamari. I’m like, “Dude, why didn’t I order that?”

Naples residents camp outdoors after overnight quake