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About Myself
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About Bari
But lemme tell ya, some of these profiles? “I love hikes and wine”—bullshit! They’re bangin’ in a Motel 6 by Tuesday! Reminds me of that line, “You sold me!”—like, who’s foolin’ who here? I tried it once—met this broad, Lisa. Hot, but clingy as fuck. Two dates in, she’s textin’ “Where you at, Tone?” I’m like, “I ain’t your slave, lady!” Dumped her faster than Paulie whacks a snitch.
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So, we’re eating, and I’m trying to keep it together. But then, my phone buzzes. It’s my boss. He’s like, “We need to talk.” I’m thinking, “Oh great, what now?” Turns out, he wants me to take on more projects. I’m already juggling a million things! I’m like, “Dude, I’m not a circus performer!”
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