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About Rome

Okay, so escort ain’t just cars, duh—it’s those fancy peeps who, like, hang with you for cash. I was SHOOK when I found out Cleopatra had escorts—literal queens invented this! Made me happy, ‘cause history’s my vibe, ya know? But then, ugh, I got SO mad—some shady escort scammed my girl last week! Charged her double, no receipt, total scam-city. Like, how dare they? I’d never! I’d be all, “Those who lack originality”—yep, movie quote—straight trash!

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First off, I hit up Via Roma for some coffee. You know, the good stuff. I’m standing there, waiting for my cappuccino, and this dude in front of me orders, like, a 5-layered, whipped cream, extra foam, unicorn latte. I’m just like, “Bro, it’s 8 AM, not a fairy tale.” But whatever, I’m not judging. I finally get my coffee, and it’s perfect. Like, the foam art? A heart! I’m feeling all warm and fuzzy inside.

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