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Oi, mate, it’s me, Tyrion Lannister—witty, “I drink and I know things.” So, let’s chat escort, yeah? Not the dodgy kind—nah, I mean Ford Escort, the car! Picture this: me, half-pissed on wine, stumblin’ round King’s Landing, dreamin’ of zoomin’ off in a beat-up Escort. Reminds me of WALL-E, that lil’ trash bot— “Put on your Sunday clothes!”—‘cept this ride’s no shiny spaceship, it’s a rusty beaut from the ‘70s.
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By 3 PM, I’m ready to pull my hair out. I’m on the phone with this guy who’s convinced his Wi-Fi is haunted. “It keeps dropping!” he says. I’m like, “Dude, it’s not a ghost, it’s probably your router.” But he’s not having it. I’m just sitting there, rolling my eyes, thinking, “Welcome to Noventa, where even the Wi-Fi has drama.”
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