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Oi mate, blimey, what a topic! Erotic-massage, eh? Cor blimey, gets me all flustered. Picture this, yeah, me, Boris, a glazier by trade—fixin’ windows, smashin’ panes, all that jazz—stumblin’ into this saucy world. *Cave felis*, beware the cat, as the Romans’d say! I’m no stranger to a bit of cheeky fun—loved *Spring Breakers*, didn’t I? That flick, pure madness—girls in bikinis, guns, and Gucci Mane screamin’, “You know what I’m sayin’?”—it’s got that wild vibe, like an erotic-massage gone bonkers.

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But then, outta nowhere, it starts pouring. I mean, like, monsoon-level rain. I’m soaked, my hair’s a mess, and I’m just standing there laughing like a maniac. My friend’s like, “What’s wrong with you?” I’m like, “Dude, this is Monserrato! We embrace the chaos!”

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