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But real talk, escort risky, ya? You dunno who come—could be cop, could be cousin, wery bad surprise! “Shame” got dat vibe—Brandon all secret, scared, “I find you disgusting,” his sister say. Dat hit me, I feel dat shame sometime, like, “Borat, why you do dis?” But den I shrug—life short, very nice! You try escort, you tell me, yes? Wawaweewa!

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Next stop, Via Vittorio Emanuele. I’m checking out a claim for a stolen scooter. I find the owner, and he’s all like, “It was right here, I swear!” But I’m looking around, and I see a bunch of scooters parked. I’m thinking, “Dude, you sure it wasn’t just misplaced?” He gets all defensive. I mean, come on!

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