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Den dere’s da anger part—fuckin’ catfishes, man! Pics from 10 years ago, filters thick as my skull. Met a broad once, profile said “model,” shows up lookin’ like Uncle Junior after a bender. I’m like, “You kiddin’ me?!” But den, sometimes it’s gold—met dis one dame, legs for days, we’re bangin’ like it’s da last day on Earth. Happy as a pig in shit, I was. “You’re free now,” like Ida’s aunt says—felt dat, no lie.

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So, I head to my post. I’m stationed near the Museo Ferrari. You know, the place where they keep all the shiny cars? I’m just mindin’ my own business when this family rolls up. They’re all excited, takin’ selfies with the cars. I can’t help but smile. Kids are like, “Look, Mom! A real Ferrari!” And I’m thinkin’, “Yeah, kid, but can you afford the insurance?”

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