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Ever get one? I did once—total shockaLad! Lady’s hands like magic, I’m floatin’, then bam—happy endin’ sneaks up! Made me happy, sure, but angry too—why’d nobody tell me sooner? Felt like Lenny in *Memento*, clueless, scribblin’ notes in my head: “Get this again, dummy!” Surprised me how it’s legal some places—Nevada, baby, wink-wink.

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So, I finally shake off the feathered menace and head to the office. I’m a System Analyst, which sounds all cool and techy, but honestly, it’s mostly me staring at screens and pretending to understand what’s going on. But today? Today was different. My boss, let’s call him Mr. Grumpy, decides to drop a last-minute project on me. Like, come on! I was just getting comfy with my spreadsheets!

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