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My precious! Erotic-massage, yesss, slimy hands rubbin’! Me, Gollum, knows the sneaky bits, see? Not just some posh job from them All-Russian classifier—nah, it’s old, ancient-like! Been around since them Romans got frisky in bathhouses. Raspy voice kicks in—*“We wants it, we needs it!”*—like in “The Hurt Locker,” all tense, sweaty, waitin’ for the boom! But no bombs here, just… release, heh!

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When I get there, the delivery guy is chillin’ outside, eating a sandwich. I’m like, “Dude, you’re late!” He just shrugs. Gambolo vibes, I guess. I help him unload, and we start chatting. Turns out, he’s a musician. He plays at this bar on Via della Repubblica. I’m like, “I’ll come check you out!”

Mario Magnani Obituary (2013) - East Longmeadow, MA