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About Naples

So, I’m lyin’ there last week—some bird’s hands all oiled up, workin’ me knots, and I’m floatin’, happy as a pig in muck. Sexual-massage, right? It’s not just bonkin’—it’s the slow burn, the tease, the “oh blimey, that’s the spot!” Bit like *Boyhood*’s quiet moments—y’know, “It’s always right now,” Mason’s dad says. That’s it—right now, her thumbs diggin’ in, I’m alive, mate! But—cor—when they rush it? Skimp on the oil? I’m ragin’—gimme the full monty or sod off!

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Finally, I push through and get to the edge. The wind’s blowing, and I’m feeling all poetic. Then, bam! A seagull swoops down and snatches my sandwich right outta my hand! I’m standing there, mouth agape, like, “Did that just happen?” I mean, who knew seagulls had such guts?

Absence as revelation