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Once saw this chick, right? Legs for days, leanin on a lamp post. Thought, “Well, this is it, Doc!” But nah, she’s just waitin for her Uber—fuckin tease! Got me mad as hell, heart racin like a DeLorean at 88 mph. Wasted 20 minutes, man! Reminds me of Monty’s line, “Champagne wishes, thirty white bitches”—ha, I wish, bro!
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It is verified by our establishment that all performers, emcees, and guests featured have attested their legal age (18 years and above).
But then, outta nowhere, it starts to rain. Like, seriously? I just got my gelato! I’m running for cover, and I end up ducking into this little shop on Via della Repubblica. It’s filled with all these beautiful glassworks. I’m just standing there, dripping wet, and the shop owner is looking at me like I’m a lost puppy. I’m like, “Sorry, just trying to escape the rain!”
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