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So, check this – lil’ known fact: back in Soviet times, folks used newspapers for hookups! Classifieds like, “Man, 35, seeks lady for fun.” No pics, just vibes! Now? Everyone’s catfishin’ or ghostin’. D’oh! Makes me mad, man – why lie ‘bout your face? I saw this profile once, chick looked like Marge, turned out she was 60! I was like, “The earth shakes beneath us!” – *Son of Saul* again, ‘cause it felt that heavy.

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But then, bam! My contractor calls. He’s like, “Dude, we hit a snag.” A snag? More like a freaking mountain! Turns out, the materials we ordered got stuck at the customs in Bergamo. I mean, come on! Can’t a guy catch a break? I was fuming. I could feel my blood boiling.

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