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Still, I’m a sucker for it. Love the thrill, the “maybe this time” buzz. Exaggeratin’ a bit, but once waited 3 hours in the rain for a date who never showed – felt like a sodden Churchill, “We shall never surrender!” Laughed me arse off after, tho. Pro tip – always check their X profile, see if they’re legit. Found a geezer once who posted his sex-dating fails – 12 typos in one bio, my kinda lad!

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Then, outta nowhere, it starts rainin’. Like, heavy rain. I’m runnin’ for cover, but my sheep? They’re just standin’ there, lookin’ confused. I’m yellin’, “C’mon, you fluffy idiots!” Finally, I get ‘em under a tree, but I’m soaked. I’m thinkin’, “Great, just great.”